Category Archives: Funny thing happened

War of the Noses

My dogs have been at war. Not with each other. No. They have decided for the past few months that out back there is a creature that must be taken down. This means that I too, have been a party to this war. My sleep is disturbed with little claws scratching at the door and frantic barking heard from the backyard. This leads to me wandering out in my pajamas and gazing around blearily. I wonder, is there more to life than this? I kid! Honestly it’s tiring. 

What the fuck are they barking at?

I don’t always mind the barking. My corgi shepherd mix is fiercely protective and sounds very ferocious. He also has the adorable  stumpy legs of a corgi and giant head a shepherd. This means that if you come near our household I will be warned. What happens after that is your fault. 

 This weekend I was alone with Sebastien. An occasion that is nice when it happens. It’s not because I want my husband gone. It’s that I do know the days of my son being willing to hang out with me are probably dwindling. I love that he is still willing to hang out in the same room while I binge watch Dance Moms. Total trash television. I am aware. Yet, during this time we also end up having some really intense conversations. Then we have silly ones that I can’t remember but mean a lot. The ones where you laugh at life and nod in solemn agreement. Yeah, he’s a cool kid.

So, this weekend we are hanging out. I had just fed the dogs and put them out. It was quiet outside and then they started up. I went out and that’s when I spotted saw Mr. Squirrel. He stopped midway across the edge of the fence, regarded me, and then jettisoned himself onto a low hanging tree branch. It buoyed momentarily in the air, and then, he was gone, disappearing into the branches above.

 Meanwhile, the dogs are tripping over themselves to catch the damn thing. 

 “Hey! Get control of yourselves! This is ridiculous!” 

 Now, if you doubt that I speak this way to the dogs, just ask the neighborhood. All will be verified, I assure you!

 I have seen the little rat bastard causing all the commotion,and I couldn’t help but laugh. This was the mystery. I had had several theories on what was taunting my dogs. There was the mole theory, another dog theory, snake theory and even scarier, the other person theory. 

I think we all have a tendency during highly stressful times in life to feel like there are bigger dangers lurking than there really are. I did that with this squirrel. I had turned it into all kinds of things. On the flip side, you can be really confident and think you have everything all figured out, and next thing you know, a mole is in the garden. I say, when the dogs keep barking, there probably is something in the yard. It just might not be what you expected.